Comunicazione non verbale e bugie: semplice curiosità o un modo per vivere meglio?

Quanti di voi si sono appassionati a Lie to Me? Per chi non la conoscesse, parliamo di una geniale serie TV (tre stagioni, tra il 2009 e il 2011) che ha come protagonista (e gran mattatore) un bravissimo Tim Roth nei panni di Cal Lightman. Insieme al suo team, Lightman riusciva a risolvere casi complicatissimi interpretando il linguaggio non verbale dei coinvolti. Gesti, microespressioni facciali, manualità, movimenti involontari tradivano gli interrogati, permettevano di arrivare alla verità dietro le parole.

Superpoteri? Assolutamente no: parliamo di qualcosa di scientificamente fondato e con una vasta bibliografia da cui attingere a piene mani.

Ma saper interpretare il linguaggio non verbale serve anche se non si è detective?

Ne abbiamo parlato con Giusy La Piana, giornalista, criminologa e scrittrice, saggista e esperta di comunicazione. La Piana è autrice di “Se menti ti scopro“, un libro (edizioni Ultra, 128pp. 14 euro su Libri Market) che affronta proprio questo argomento. Che conferma l’utilità di saper interpretare la comunicazione non verbale nella vita di ogni giorno. Ecco la nostra intervista.

Selfie con libro giusy la piana se menti ti scopro
Giusy La Piana in un selfie con il suo libro “Se menti ti scopro”.

Giusy La Piana, se mento mi scopre. Come fa?

“Il linguaggio spontaneo del corpo è come una sorta di cartina tornasole dei nostri sentimenti ed emozioni. Attraverso lo studio e la pratica quotidiana dell’osservazione, è quindi possibile imparare a cogliere sfumature che sfuggono ad un occhio non allenato alla lettura della comunicazione non verbale. I segnali di disagio e di menzogna spesso si annidano nella discordanza fra i segnali non verbali manipolati e quelli istintivi, e nelle incongruenze fra affermazioni e risposte fisiologiche. Non a caso, una buona base da cui partire per avere relazioni di successo in ogni ambito è fare in modo, nei limiti del possibile, che messaggio verbale e non verbale siano in accordo e sincronia”.

A chi è rivolto questo manuale?

Se menti ti scopro è un coaching individuale per migliorare la qualità della comunicazione interpersonale, delle relazioni, sul lavoro e nella vita privata. Come comunichiamo influenza in modo significativo la considerazione che gli altri hanno di noi. Di conseguenza, la buona comunicazione è un’esigenza che riguarda tutti: che siate studenti o docenti, mamme a tempo pieno o single in cerca di nuove frequentazioni, suocere o nuore, dipendenti o imprenditori, inoccupati o precari in cerca di stabilità, consulenti di vendita o appassionati di shopping, grazie a Se menti ti scopro potrete trasformare la vostra comunicazione interpersonale in uno strumento per il successo quotidiano”.

Perché è importate saper interpretare la comunicazione non verbale al giorno d’oggi?

È importante da sempre. Già dalla nascita, ancora prima di parlare, iniziamo a trasmettere informazioni su noi stessi. Pensiamo, ad esempio, al pianto che il neonato usa per comunicare situazioni di disagio. Starà alla bravura dei genitori comprendere se il problema da risolvere sia la fame o il pannolino bagnato. Poi però, quando cresciamo, ci focalizziamo più sulle parole che ascoltiamo che su quello che il linguaggio del corpo sta comunicando. Ci insegnano ad abbassare lo sguardo o a rivolgerlo altrove perché fissare l’interlocutore è poco educato e fastidioso. E già dopo le prime scaramucce pre-adolescenziali inizia a farsi strada nel nostro quotidiano il concetto di quieto vivere: ci abituiamo, a poco a poco, a soprassedere e a non dare troppo peso a ciò che istintivamente percepiamo o che non ci convince del tutto. Nessuno ci insegna quanto lo studio della comunicazione non verbale possa essere d’aiuto per evitare o disinnescare i fraintendimenti che avvelenano o logorano i rapporti personali e professionali, per leggere la reale intenzione altrui ancora prima che venga pronunciata, per rimettere al suo posto chi prova a manipolarci, per esprimere al meglio noi stessi conquistando un’immagine affidabile e propositiva, e anche per parlare in pubblico in modo ancora più convincente”.

Da dove nasce l’esigenza e la voglia di lanciarsi in un libro del genere per una giornalista da suo curriculum*?

“Nasce dalla mia voglia di addentrarmi nelle dinamiche comunicative utili a rapportarsi meglio con gli altri e a innalzare, fortificare e vitaminizzare la qualità della vita quotidiana delle persone. Questo libro si basa su competenze e conoscenze che ho acquisito in circa venti anni di formazione e oltre quindici di carriera nel mondo della comunicazione. Non solo le mie specializzazioni da comunicatrice e criminologa ma anche tutte le persone che ho incrociato nella vita, per un piccolissimo tratto o per un lungo periodo, hanno contribuito alla messa a punto delle strategie di comunicazione interpersonale contenute in Se menti ti scopro“.

* Giusy La Piana ha esordito nella saggistica con L’Impero dei Pizzini – La carriera criminale di Bernardo Provenzano. Ha firmato inoltre: Caro Presidente – Scuola e lavoro per battere la mafia volume pubblicato su iniziativa della Presidenza della Camera dei Deputati. Ha condotto ricerche in ambito accademico su “Cultura, scrittura e strategie di comunicazione mafiosa”. Nel 2010, ha pubblicato, per SBC Edizioni, il saggio “Strategie di comunicazione mafiosa”, un’originale analisi del linguaggio e del comportamento mafioso sotto il profilo criminologico-comunicativo (fonte: Wikipedia).

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    Over the years, Las Vegas has developed into a major metropolitan area with a population of 646,790 and 832,
    367 households. The city is well-connected by Interstate 11, a significant highway that offers easy access
    for both tourists and locals. An interesting fact about Las Vegas
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    and tear on homes, necessitating regular maintenance.
    These temperature extremes can impact roofing, HVAC systems, and other critical components of a home.

    Las Vegas offers a plethora of points of interest that cater to diverse tastes.
    AREA15 is an immersive entertainment complex offering a range of
    attractions and experiences. Aliante Nature Discovery Park is
    ideal for nature lovers, with beautiful landscapes and walking trails.
    The Asylum-Hotel Fear Haunted House provides a thrilling adventure for those seeking a scare.

    The Atomic Museum offers fascinating insights into
    the history of nuclear science, while the Bellagio Conservatory
    & Botanical Gardens impresses visitors with its stunning floral displays and seasonal
    themes.

    Opting for Love Cloud Las Vegas for a mile high club flight is the ultimate way
    to celebrate special moments. This VIP flight experience offers unparalleled privacy and luxury, making it perfect for weddings in the sky, proposal flights, or
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